CAT BATTLE ROYALE

so we have three cats at our house, three whole cats. one cat is this big fucking MANLY cat made of nearly pure muscle who's like 20 years old and will probably live another 15-20, another is this cute white cat who absolutely does not give a fuck about anything (i've watched her sunbathe in the middle of the highway outside out house) and the other is this small ratty cat who's 6 years old but hasn't grown since she was maybe 8 months and just curls up in a corner like some solitairy little fucker all day

all three hate each other

anyways, there's a reason my parents are out of town; they're getting a fluffy toy dog. they already have a spacious cage type thing set up in the living room that's and so i've divised a plan. i'm turning it into a battle royale. i know this is fucked up and i'm probably really stupid for doing it but i'll monitor the activities in case anybody gets hurt. anyways, i've set up a 'battlefield' of sorts; on one side is this glorious cushiony bed thing that the cats love to sleep on, on the other side is a blanket, and on the last side; fucking nothing but cold hardwood floor. in the middle of the battlefield is food dishes and water, and the golden prize: a bowl of wet cat food. there are also some toys sitting around for the cats to play with

i'm going to put all three inside and watch the madness, totl. i'll keep you updated as it happens

Film it.

Magician wrote:Film it.

i would if i could

k im just rounding the cats up so i can get them in as fast as i can without anybody getting hurt prior to the battle royale starting

oh fuck i forgot to tell you, the blanketed part is lightly sprinkled with catnip. whoever gets that spot is going to go batshit crazy

aaaaand THEY'RE IN! immediately all 3 cats went diving for the wet catfood. The small ratty cat got batted away by manly and then the white cat saw and ran off into the blanketed area. Ratty is currently sitting in her cushioned throne and manly is enjoying his big bowl of fancy feast.

okay so manly is still eating his food, ratty is still sitting arrogantly in her cushioned cushioned and white is high off her ass on catnip, like fucking rolling around, trilling at the other cats and other shit like that. she just got up and started playing with one of the toys and is going directly towards manly

and lol

white ran right into manly. manly didn't even notice and just kept eating. white realized that she was right by her mortal nemesis and did what a cat who doesn't give a fuck would do in this situation; took a swat at him. manly gets up, looks at her right in her eyes from about a centimeter away and goes back to eating. white then tries to eat some of the food, manly reacts by clenching up and smacking her with his absolute might. white flies back a little, gets up, pauses for a second and then goes back to rolling around in catnip

manly just finished eating and now he's taking a nap right in the center of the battkefield with all the toys and food he could ever want. white is slowly starting to pass out and ratty is just silently watching

idk if anything else is going to happen but if anything does i'll be sure to post it

this would've been amazing had you filmed it

[REDACTED] wrote:this would've been amazing had you filmed it

i dont have anything to record with ;_;

nothing really happened so i put them away ;_;